The Story of the Hamster Wheel: How "Why Me?" Became "What Now?" By Cortney Donelson

Exodus 9:16 (NIV)
“But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.”

I stood in the pet store and watched the hamster spinning his rickety wheel. “That’s us,” I thought out loud. Our lives had become one giant hamster wheel where every day we woke up, partook in the same routine tasks packaged as the “American Dream,” and then went to bed feeling exhausted yet unfulfilled. My husband and I watched the hamster for a few more minutes. “Using all that energy and going nowhere,” my husband observed. We went home feeling depressed.

The depressed mood came and went for several years. We knew life was more than the American Dream. It’s more than jobs, grocery stores, car repairs, sick kids, karate, church, birthday parties, bills, friends, or even success. We knew God created us for a very specific purpose, and we were not living it yet. We just didn’t know how to find that specific purpose!

Explaining this feeling to others was difficult. We had been small group leaders and volunteered in a myriad of opportunities inside and outside the church. Some people thought that was “enough” … but God wasn’t done with us yet.

Our marriage and spirits had already survived more than three years of infertility struggles. Due to those struggles, our God-ordained path had taken us to Russia and then to China for the adoption of our children. In many cases, people thought that was “enough” … but God wasn’t done with us yet.

My husband and I read the book “Radical” by David Platt. One of many thought-provoking quotes from his book is "…have we replaced what is radical about our faith with what is comfortable? Are we settling for Christianity that revolves around catering to ourselves when the central message of Christianity is actually about abandoning ourselves?" We wondered what we might abandon to be radical about discovering God’s purpose for us.

Over the next few months, we continued to sense that God was preparing us for something big. I felt as if I was ready for anything – anything that would help us define our purpose. Be careful what you pray for! One day it materialized. Terrible news rocked our world. Exodus 9:16 says, “But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.” It’s a powerfully intimidating verse if you are willing to follow it to the end of God’s story and not just to the limited expectations of how you want your story to read. We were about to abandon the hamster wheel.

God had been relentlessly preparing our hearts so that when the time came, we would not fall down but be raised up for the purpose He designed for us. Queen Esther knew a little something about being raised up to fulfill a God-given destiny. In Esther 4:14, as she is learning about the plans to murder all the Jews, it reads, “... And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?”  When our world fell apart, most people would have run for the hills – we fell to our knees. From our “royal” position, we asked, “What now, God?” instead of asking, “Why me, God?”

See, the “Why us?” question had been answered throughout all the years following the visit to that pet store. We abandoned the “Why us?” because the answer is it’s ALL of us. All of us will go through a crisis. All of us will make choices about how we respond to those crises. All of us have weaknesses that are made perfect through Christ who strengthens us. All of us have a destiny. So, when the time came for our specific destiny to be revealed, the better question became, “What now, God? What do we do now? Show us how You will make this beautiful. Help us understand what we can do to use this for your story for us – a story that will glorify You and impact many if we choose to say yes.”

Do you sometimes feel like you are running on that hamster wheel? Do you get to the end of a day and ask, “What is the point?” Do you sense a bigger purpose for your life? My guess is that it’s a common feeling … to believe God has a plan for you that is more significant than any “American Dream.” When tough times come, perhaps you will choose to change your question. Rather than asking God, “Why me?,” try asking Him, “What now?” You might just get an answer that will bump you off that rickety wheel and change your life forever!


Prayer – God, thank You for the promise of eternity. Despite challenges and dark valleys in this life, we know we can lean on You and ask the question, “What now?” – perhaps catching a glimpse of Your purpose for our lives here on earth. Remind us that Your plans take us past this world and into Your Kingdom where our ultimate destiny will finally be realized. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

© 2012 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.

Having Healing Hands By Cortney Donelson

Acts 3: 6-7 (NIV)
“Then Peter said, ‘Silver or gold I do not have, but what I have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk.’ Taking him (a disabled beggar) by the right hand, he helped him up, and instantly the man’s feet and ankles became strong.”

Occasionally, I am a doubting Thomas. I could be more like Peter, as described in this scripture. Working in healthcare, I often think about putting my hands on my patients and healing them instantly. Wow! That would certainly increase my pay grade! However, I never believed this was realistic.

The Bible tells me something different. Just as Peter (fully human) did in Acts 3: 6-7, we can call on Jesus and pray for healing for any pain, hurt, or disability – be it physical or emotional – and know that healing can occur. Notice the wording of the verse: “ ... but what I have I give you.” Peter understood what he had as a faithful follower of Christ. As Believers, God's awesome power is housed within us. Every ounce of His miraculous strength resides in our bodies. That is too cool! If aligned with God’s will and plan, we are one faithful prayer away from unleashing this power and witnessing miraculous healing. Peter tells the crowd in later verses in the book of Acts, “By faith in the name of Jesus, this man whom you see and know was made strong. It is Jesus’ name and the faith that comes through him that has given this complete healing to him, as you can all see.”

I am a living testimony to this miracle. My husband and I prayerfully chose to adopt a little girl from China who had been diagnosed with a serious brain condition. In a nutshell, the front portion (lobe) of her brain was small compared to the other areas of her brain. The frontal lobe is responsible for movement, personality, higher learning skills, knowing right from wrong, having impulse control – among many other things. Neurosurgeons here in the United States could not tell us exactly what her abilities, personality, or behaviors would be in the long or short term. Chinese documents told us she was behind others her age developmentally. My husband and I were understandably scared; however, we did not allow that fear to keep us from hearing and obeying God’s call on our hearts to bring this precious child into our home as our own beloved daughter.

While we waited to travel, I prayed every day for complete healing for my daughter. I prayed her frontal lobe would develop and that there would be no signs or symptoms of her diagnosis. We waited six months to travel. In all, it was 176 days of prayer. I prayed with faith that our Ultimate Healer would work a miracle within my daughter on the other side of the world. I cupped my hands in prayer and asked the Lord's healing hands to deliver an amazing ending to this story. The more I prayed, the more I was able to trust Jesus.

The ending to our story is not uncommon to those who believe the lesson in Acts. When we traveled to China and finally brought her home, our daughter was perfectly healthy! There were absolutely no signs or symptoms of her brain diagnosis. In fact, our pediatrician – an adoption specialist who has brought a couple of his own kiddos home from around the world – saw no need to even verify the Chinese diagnosis with an MRI here in the United States. She has been home for over two years now, and we continue to see no reason to follow up on that scary diagnosis. Praise Jesus!

You too may be just one faithful prayer away from having healing hands!

Prayer – Dear Lord, thank You for the Holy Spirit that lives in us! Thank You for giving us Jesus, the Ultimate Healer. Please continually remind us that You are all powerful and have every illness, every diagnosis, and every disease in the palms of Your hands. I pray we have the faith it takes to just believe in Your promises and in Your Word, fully aware that healing comes in so many forms and is always in Your perfect timing! In Jesus’ name, I pray. AMEN!

© 2012 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.

One Who Illuminates By Cortney Donelson

Welcome to my new devotional blog! My prayer is that you will find encouragement and hope within the words and pictures that God lays on my heart to share here. Please feel free to leave comments. I welcome your feedback! This first devotional is an explanation of the title of my blog, As A Clay Jar. Enjoy, and God bless!

 2 Corinthians 4:7 (NLT)

“We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”

Some of my closest friends gave me a new name… a Hebrew name, Meira. It means, “One who Illuminates.” Let me explain. These wonderful Christian women view me as the “Light” of the group. There are eight of us in this accountability group, and each has her own significant name, apart from her birth name. Some of the names are Ariel or “Lion of God,” Rafaela or “Healed by God”, Cherut or “Freedom”, and Liron or “My Song.”

These names are a reflection of how a Holy Creator designed us as uniquely as He did each snowflake that falls from the sky. The names also highlight our God-inspired strengths. They represent the holy piece of God that we carry around on display for others to see.

I love my name. It was given to me during a very dark time in my life. It was a reminder of God’s truth and His promises. I may be a fragile jar made of clay where life’s trials and struggles can crack my exterior and bring me to my knees. However, the Holy Spirit within me is a light that can shine forth through those cracks, spreading joy, hope, and truth.

My cracks won’t cause me to crumble. My difficult days won’t cause me death. Even more amazing than what the Lord does for my heart is how He can use my imperfections and struggles to minister to others. I can be sitting in my own dark cave, and I can still shine with His Light for those around me. I may be ripping at the seams, yet I can still provide to others that same joy, hope, and truth that the Lord provides for me.

That is the glory of it all. God is bigger than any of our cracks. He is bigger and better. His power is infinitely stronger than our flesh and the enemy’s tactics combined. As 2 Corinthians 4:7 states, “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.” That great treasure is God himself…. How does He shine through you? Is it through worship and praise? Is it through ministering to wounded hearts or breaking down walls? Perhaps it is through speaking like a Holy megaphone. For me, it is shining his Light into darkness, illuminating the path for others to see.

Prayer – Dear Lord, we whole-heartedly thank you for creating us to be delicate vessels that will never shatter as long as we have You. We praise you for every good and perfect gift you provide, despite our mistakes, weaknesses, and shortcomings. You are a great treasure! Thank you that even in darkness, you have and will continue to overcome! In Jesus’ Name, I pray. AMEN!

© 2012 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.