Finding Holiness ... by Choosing Meekness By Cortney Donelson

Source: Unknown

Matthew 5:5 (NIV)

“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.”

Psalm 37:11 (NIV)

“But the meek will inherit the land and enjoy peace and prosperity.”

When you hear the word meek, what do you think? Does it conjure up images of a shy and quiet individual – perhaps one who is so submissive as to allow others to take advantage of him? Is meekness a sign of weakness?

I used to think so…

Then something happened. During a women’s retreat in the mountains of North Carolina at the Billy Graham Training Center at The Cove, I learned a few things about what God thinks of the meek. Matthew 5:5 and Psalm 37:11 both promise the meek an inheritance of the whole earth. “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.” Then it gets better! The meek will enjoy two more conditions we all long for: peace and prosperity. “But the meek will inherit the land and enjoy peace and prosperity.” While journaling at that retreat, I wrote this prayer on March 14, 2009: Lord, make me meek so that I can be strong for You. Take away my selfish ambitions and make me ambitious for You. Since that time, God has answered my prayer in an interesting (and extremely effective) way. God did not make me meek. Instead, He showers me with opportunities to choose meekness. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ikes4yPulmI) And for the most part, I do…

The primary definition of meek in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary is “showing patience and humility; enduring injury with patience and without resentment.” Wow! That is the poster-description of Christ Jesus. Even though Pontius Pilate had found no legal grounds for death, Jesus, in a total display of meekness, picked up His cross and started up the hill past His accusers. Then while hanging on the cross, Jesus asked God for mercy on those who were crucifying Him. There was no resentment. There was no anger. There was certainly no selfish ambition or pride. There was no retribution or revenge. There was only patience, love, and forgiveness – a total display of holiness.

Haven’t we all been in a place where we've had the opportunity to choose how to respond to injustice? A trusted friend betrays us beyond what we think we can handle. Someone rejects or abandons us in such a painful and profound way that we are unsure of what to do or how to react. An unfair accusation or label is forced upon us without proof, remorse, or concern. For me, there is nothing harder on this earth than choosing to patiently endure an injustice, swallow my pride, forsake my reputation, or forgive the unforgivable. But I have done it.

You can too.

One of my “wound” buttons is the fear of being misunderstood. My insides rip apart if I believe someone has judged me without hearing my side of the story – my motives, my thought-processes, my prayers, or the reasons behind my decisions. So when an unfair and one-sided accusation from my personal world was shared with my boss in my professional world, I felt the weight of pride and reputation heavy on my shoulders. This is unfair! Her side of the story is so different from mine. She painted me in such a bad light. That was so inappropriate to share with my boss. What will he think of me? I need to tell him my perspective and set things straight! Anger tore. Peace was nowhere to be found during the heated battle within my heart.

However, I did what I have now learned is the only thing to do when expectations go unmet and emotions threaten to bubble over into regretful words and actions. I immediately started to pray. God reminded me that this was yet another opportunity to become strong for Him … by choosing to be meek like Christ. That IS what I asked for so many years ago – for Him to take away my selfish ambitions. He showed me that succumbing to the bickering and justifying my side of the story would only escalate the situation. My boss was not looking for answers, for drama, or for personal agendas. He wasn't looking for anything. God reminded me He is the God of justice too. This did not have to be my battle to fight. So I swallowed my pride, put on the cloak of meekness, and chose to let it go.

At times, I still struggle with finding my “inner meek”, and sometimes I am not successful. But guess what? When I let this specific slander go, as I gave it over to God and in return was filled with God’s grace, peace ensued. The weight of reputation and pride lifted and was replaced with God’s forgiveness. Through the work of the Holy Spirit, I became a little more like Christ – a little more holy.

Prayer –Thank You, God, for opportunities to become more Christ-like, more holy. I pray we choose to say yes to those opportunities every time. Yet even when we do fall, and when we chose pride, selfish ambition, or anger, You are there for us then too. For the life, work, death and resurrection of Jesus, we are eternally grateful. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

© 2013 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.

Waiting Therapy By Cortney Donelson

Source: Unknown

Lamentations 3:24 (NIV)

“I say to myself, ‘The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.”

As a licensed physical therapist, I know the four stages of ice therapy forward and backward. First, there is the cold stage. The satisfying cold sensation soon turns to tingling and burning in the next stage. The third stage is the aching stage. Finally, the fourth and most important stage is numbness. Presto! Your pain is gone.

Recently, God asked me to wait on Him for something I had been pursuing for a long time. I agreed, keeping His Word in my heart. “I say to myself, ‘The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.” As I spent countless months in that season of waiting, the Lord showed me that like my patients who experience those four stages of cold therapy, I would experience similar phases in this God-designed “waiting therapy.”

The Cold Stage: When a person in pain first places the ice pack on the offending body part, there is a moment of relief. The cold energizes the patient and leaves them feeling good. That’s what happened 18 months ago, when a kind of pain emerged in my life. The offender was my part-time job. The number of hours I worked for this remote role – one that allowed me flexibility and the opportunity to be home with my young children – started to dwindle as the client pool dried up. What had been 50 billable hours per month plummeted to an average of two. Money started to get tight. Yet from the start of the slide, I had a sense that it was God closing this door for me, not some trial or tribulation propelled by any worldly cause. So, I had a certain peace about it. Then, when God provided a glimpse of what was in my future, I became energized. As I waited for God to show me more and lead me onto my new path, I was able to remain eager and feeling good. There was no anxiety – only an energized waiting. I was in Stage One of waiting therapy.

The Tingling and Burning Stage: Several months into that excitement, I have to admit, I started to get edgy. My trust in God never waned, but my ability to understand His timing started to diminish. Just as with cold therapy, that initial pleasant feeling of energized waiting became less … nice. This was uncomfortable waiting. Just as my patients look at me with a question in their eyes as the tingling and burning increase, I looked up to God with a question of my own. This isn’t as fun, anymore, God. Why so much waiting? I had become nervously patient. I found myself in Stage Two of waiting therapy.

The Aching Stage:  This is gut-check time. During cold therapy, patients tend to reach toward their ice packs in anticipation of removing them. The aching seems unbearable – sometimes worse than the original pain. I always stop them. This is not because I am some mean-spirited physical therapist intent on proving the adage, “no pain, no gain.” It is because I know what is to come.

The wait in my life became agonizing, as well, as I entered a time of painful waiting. For more than a year, my spending had far outweighed my earning, and my bank account was showing signs of strain. My nervous patience turned into a frustrated and somewhat defeated IMpatience. I looked up to God as fear began to scratch at the outer walls of my heart. Had I missed something?

Then I did something for God that I have always urged my patients to do for me. I trusted God because I realized His timing and His plan were trustworthy. I was reminded that this is the stage that made Job famous. It is the stage about which Jesus and His disciples teach us throughout the New Testament. In 1 Peter 1:6-7, the apostle Peter praises the Lord and reminds God’s people of the living hope found in Jesus:“In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith – of greater worth than gold … may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.”  I looked at all the past moments stamped with God’s faithfulness, and I let go of the fear creeping into my heart.  I wanted my faith proved genuine, so I said to God: Your will be done. I do trust You.

As it turns out, God was developing my perseverance during my waiting therapy. I could have reached out and attempted to move plans forward on my own. Just as my patients have the choice to remove that ice pack too early, I could have tried to make things happen independent of God and His timing. As the weeks went by, I instead chose to follow Scripture and keep waiting – leaving the aching and longing in place rather than going forward alone. As it turns out, I finally reached that sweet stage where all the pain disappears, where God makes things good as He unfolds His curiously awesome design. My wait ended with something spectacular – a dream job – one I could never have found or created on my own.

Are you waiting on the Lord? No matter what stage you are in, take heart. The wait is worth it!

Psalm 27:14

Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Psalm 130:5

I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.

Prayer –Thank You, Lord, for our waiting therapy. It builds character and perseverance … and trust in You. After all, trust is our primary task, and Your timing and plans have never ceased to amaze.  In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

© 2013 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.

The Magic Quilt By Cortney Donelson

Psalm 46:1 (NIV)

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”

Source: www.ninasgallery.net

I heard the words from the television as I stood in the bathroom drying my hair: “You just need this magic quilt so you’re not afraid.” My curiosity was piqued, and my eyes followed suit. I poked my head around the corner to see what my daughter was watching. It was a cartoon about a little boy who was afraid to get in the pool for a swim lesson. The swim instructor was offering him a blanket (a.k.a. magic quilt) to cuddle with before jumping into the water. “It will take away all your fear.” Really?

I want a magic quilt! In fact, please give me twelve! There have been many times I would have loved to hide under a soft blanket, soak in its fear-expunging powers, and been able to tackle whatever monster that elicited those fears and worries head-on. There was the morning my son was wheeled into surgery at age three. Or the horrifying minutes when at age two, he went missing at a Fourth of July festival among thousands of people. I cannot forget the time when both my husband and I were laid off – a week apart. (Even the nice people at the unemployment office were horrified.) I would have been keen on owning a magic quilt that could extinguish all the worry and fear associated with those instances.

We laugh, but we can be like the children watching these cartoons too. While there are no actual magic quilts that will cover our anxiety, we adults still try to utilize other ridiculous and worldly “fixes” in order to minimize our pain and fear. Alcohol, power, drugs, relationships, sex, careers, success, food, tobacco, fame, shopping … the list goes on. What was my downfall? I used to employ control tactics in order to cover my heartache or fear. My MO, so to speak, was to take charge, give orders, remove choices, and find quick solutions. I was a pro at the ability to compartmentalize, minimize, and strategize. I would pretend I was in complete control and hoped it appeared to others that nothing bothered me.  In truth, inwardly I was paralyzed by fear.

Frankly, it was a very egotistical coping skill. Thankfully, God opened my eyes to a new way. There is one fool-proof approach to chase away the spirits of fear and worry – even for an intermittent fool like me. His name is the great I AM.

Psalm 46:1 states rather emphatically,“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” The Bible leaves no room for various interpretations here. God is always our refuge … our magic quilt if you will. When terror invades our spaces, the Lord is there to help. When financial stability plummets and there is no end to the spiral in sight, the Lord is our strength. When physical pain or loss threatens our future, the Lord is our refuge. When friends betray us, the Lord is there to comfort our hurting hearts. And when evil lurks via the temptations of this world, our Lord can speak over the fear and guard us from the ungodly enticements with His truth and love.  In fact, turning to anything else is idolatry.

So what has this looked like in my life? Here’s an example of a time fear and worry began to overwhelm me and my only option was to let the Lord’s continuous presence smother that fear:

All marriages go through winter seasons. My husband’s and my most recent winter season lasted a long couple of years. I felt as if we were not only on different pages, but we weren’t even living in the same storybook – and it certainly was no fairytale. As ships passing in the night, we rarely talked about anything significant. Instead, our communication was logistical in nature – superficial planning to make it through a day. There was no talk of long-term goals or dreams. For various reasons, we were not connecting on an intimate level. As the months went by, my fears rose. I had no idea what my husband was thinking or how he felt about me. Lies began to embed themselves into my fragile mental state, and it became more difficult to guard my thoughts. Worry crept in and tried to convince me that our relationship was a terrible one, deep-set into winter with no warm hint of spring at the end. Doubts surfaced. Does he still love me? Am I still attractive to him?

So, I began to pray. I prayed hard. I asked God for a miracle. I sought His ever-present help in this time of trouble and fear. I wrapped myself in the quilt of our Lord. No surprises – or magic – here: God was there. Miraculously, winter finally turned to spring. With God’s continued grace and blessing, spring preceded a long summer, and all my icy fears melted away. Since those prayers, summer has reigned.

Are you facing trouble? Is there a fear you are harboring, hoping some magic quilt will appear around your quaking shoulders? Even if earthquakes come and mountains tremble, wrap yourself in God’s love, read about His truth, and most importantly, choose to have hope in His promises. Sing Him praises, regardless of the circumstances. Unlike a magic quilt, God is real. Unlike any misguided coping technique, He will sustain you. It's a promise.

Psalm 18:3 – “Praising I will call upon the Lord; and I shall be saved from my enemies.”

Prayer –Thank You, Lord.We choose to sing your praises. For You are our refuge and strength. Unlike those things we try to fill our heart holes with, only You can sustain us. Only You can heal us. You can build us up, and only You can give us the peace that passes all understanding. Thank You for all of it. In Jesus’name I pray, Amen.

© 2013 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.

Fleshing it Out By Cortney Donelson

1 Samuel  6:7-8 (NIV)

“The Spirit of the Lord will come powerfully upon you, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you.”

Some of you know this already: I am writing a book.

I would like to admit something here: it’s hard. Wait - it’s more than hard. It is such an enormous task – an overwhelming challenge really – that at times I wonder if I will finish it before my preschool-age daughter strides across the stage at her high school graduation.

But it’s fun too. The writing of this book is producing endless excitement because with every word I type, I am finding my purpose in this tricky, rat-race kind of world. I say “the writing” rather than “my writing” because it truly is God’s book. Many times, I have gone back to re-read chapters and wonder how the sentences have been constructed just right. I skim over paragraphs for the hundredth time and find myself in awe of how the message has come together. It is not me. It is all God.

As I painstakingly tried to construct a portion of a chapter for the “dozenth time” the other day, I gave myself this order: Just sit down and do it; flesh out this hard part. As soon as the period signifying the end of my thought was scripted across my brain, I began laughing out loud at myself. The error of my mindset was like a blazing neon sign above the door to my heart. Flesh it out? That, my dear self, is precisely why this part has been so hard to write.

Source: Unknown

I don’t want my flesh on the pages of this book. I don’t want my selfish goals, my flawed writing skills, my prideful ambition, or my dysfunctional views to be the highlights in this story that God is writing through me. I want His fingerprints all over it. I want His selfless love, His spiritual stamp, His dreams, and His message to be as evident as that neon sign – the one that blinked over the door to my heart. This book is God’s heart for you, just typed out through my experiences. So, if I try to “flesh it out” without prayerfully allowing God to overtake my words, I have not done Him, or you, any justice.

The expression “to flesh it out” means to add details or clarify a grand plan. This book is one of God’s grand plans for my life. So rather than trying to meticulously craft something on my own without submitting to God’s leadership and direction, I want to “Spirit it out” instead. I need to tap into my deep places where the Holy Spirit reigns. It’s the only way to do this thing right.

King Saul wanted to do things right too – at least initially. As God called Samuel to anoint Saul as king, Saul was able to “Spirit it out” and do things he never would have been able to do without God. “The Spirit of the Lord will come powerfully upon you, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you.” (1 Samuel 6:7-8) Did you hear that? When you live out God’s purpose for your life, “… you will be changed into a different person … (you will be able to) do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you.” I have never written a book before. In God’s perfect timing, just like with Saul, He came not just upon me, but powerfully upon me, so much so that I am able to put blessed words to my story despite my lack of experience or training. My hands found this laptop just as His message was ready to be told, and He is with me.

There is a song called “Steal My Show” by Toby Mac. It’s one of my favorites. I like to soak in the words of it before I do anything in Christ’s name or for God’s glory. Here is the chorus:

If You wanna steal my show
I'll sit back and watch You go
If You got somethin' to say
Go on and take it away
Need You to steal my show
Can't wait to watch You go, oh, oh
So take it away

Maybe I am not alone. Perhaps you are trying to flesh something out on your own without handing over those leadership reigns to God. Perhaps you are changing jobs or even careers without allowing God to lead you to the correct path. Or maybe you find yourself working for man instead of for God. Some of you may be painstakingly planning something for God’s glory without dutifully allowing Him to “steal your show” because you are working within your timing, your goals, and your ambitions. 

If there is something you need to “Spirit out”, let’s pray through this together…

Prayer – God, lead us. Lead our life’s journeys, use our gifts, help us Spirit out our difficult circumstances, and encourage us to submit to Your ways. I pray we remember to tap into Your power and strength that resides from within rather than rely on our own flesh and skills. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen!

© 2013 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.

You Gotta Play to Win By Cortney Donelson

Luke 16:22-23

“The time came when the beggar (Lazarus) died and the angels carried him to Abraham’s side. The rich man also died and was buried. In Hades, where he was in torment, he looked up and saw Abraham far away, with Lazarus by his side.”

Source: Unknown

I have certain boundaries that I like to believe keep me safe.

I refuse to leave the house with the clothes dryer running, I don’t play with fire or run with scissors, and I always avoid shiny plants with three leaves. This helps me to avoid burned houses, lost eyesight, and itchy rashes. Likewise, I don’t typically play the lottery. It’s too risky. Gambling addiction is not something to which I want to fall prey. Only if the jackpot is $33 million, $333 million, or more than $500 million, will I buy a ticket. I set boundaries for myself when it comes to taking risks. It’s just what I do.

So, when my husband sent me a text saying his co-workers were going in together on the $600 million Powerball lottery, my response was simple: “You gotta play to win.”As I hit send on my return text, the phrase rang a bell in my heart. I know the sound well. God was giving me another title.

Soon, a question took up residence inside me: Why don’t more people accept Jesus' invitation to follow Him? I think many of us would answer: Because it’s risky.

There is a risk in going all-in with God. Maybe we believe that we will miss out on certain things if we become truly committed to His will – comfort, happiness, security, wealth, our own plan for our lives, relationships … the list goes on. The truth is there is a risk.

But I have to share something: In the "following Jesus" gamble of a lifetime, both the reward AND the journey itself are worth the risk! If we are not able to surrender those earthly things we tend to over-value, we may lose what God values for our eternity. In fact, at the end of our lives, whether we win or lose in God's eyes is the only thing that matters. The rich man in the story of Luke 16 was successful by society's standards. The fear of losing everything of value if He chose to follow God outweighed his understanding of what he might gain for his sacrifice. He believed the risk too great. He chose his worldly possessions over a God who could give him everything he would ever need for thousands of years to come. This rich man didn't play to win; he played to lose. And he lost big!

Luke shares a story told by Jesus to help illustrate the enormity of not playing to win for God's glory. Jesus wanted the message to be clear: The risk is worth the reward. “The time came when the beggar died and the angels carried him to Abraham’s side. The rich man also died and was buried. In Hades, where he was in torment, he looked up and saw Abraham far away, with Lazarus by his side.” Our lives here are temporary. Possessions, success, material goods and accolades – they all stay here when we leave this earth. If we choose Jesus now, our illnesses, our fears, our pain, and our tears will vanish when we meet Jesus in Heaven.

In his book, “Not a Fan,” Kyle Idleman writes, “The most dangerous part of following Jesus tomorrow isn't what you will lose between now and then. That’s not the worst thing that can happen. The worst thing that can happen is that tomorrow might never come.”  We are not promised another day here in our temporary home. One day, tomorrow never came for the rich man in the Book of Luke. He lost based on his choices on earth. Once he realized that, he tried to save his brothers who were living much like he had.

“So he (the rich man) called to him, ‘Father Abraham, have pity on me and send Lazarus to dip the tip of his finger in water and cool my tongue, because I am in agony in this fire.’

But Abraham replied, ‘Son, remember that in your lifetime you received your good things, while Lazarus received bad things, but now he is comforted here and you are in agony. And besides all this, between us and you a great chasm has been set in place, so that those who want to go from here to you cannot, nor can anyone cross over from there to us.’

He answered, ‘Then I beg you, father, send Lazarus to my family, for I have five brothers. Let him warn them, so that they will not also come to this place of torment.’

Abraham replied, ‘They have Moses and the Prophets; let them listen to them.’

‘No, father Abraham,’ he said, ‘but if someone from the dead goes to them, they will repent.’

He said to him, ‘If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, they will not be convinced even if someone rises from the dead.’”

For me, this story is quite frightening. It paints a scary picture of Hades and calls it a "place of torment” – as in a forever and ever place of torment.

The Bible makes this plain and simple: There is one guaranteed way to heaven – through a decision for Christ made now. Not tomorrow. Not next year. Not when the kids are grown. Not when you retire. Certainly not when you have your life together. Jesus died on that cross and rose from the dead for you – for me – for now. You gotta play to win today. 

Tomorrow just may be too late.

                                                                                              

Oh – and the Powerball lottery outcome? We won! Eight dollars split eight ways. Kaboom!

Prayer – Lord, I chose to follow You today, tomorrow, and all the rest of my days here on earth. I am all-in for Your cause. Please give me the courage to say yes to You in times where I will be tempted to play to lose out of fear for what I may miss out on here. Heaven is worth it. You are worth it. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen

© 2013 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.