Little Miss Independent By Cortney Donelson

Romans 1:21 (NIV)

“For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.”

Source: Unkown

One of the enemy’s darkest and most convincing lies is that we can do this on our own.

We can’t. Trust me; I’ve tried.

We can’t fill the holes in our hearts – the gaping ones that bleed with insecurity, loneliness, and rejection. Those are God-shaped holes.

We can’t discern truth from lies. It takes God’s whispers, the Holy Spirit’s promptings, and other believers’ reminders to unleash the wisdom and confidence it takes to stand our ground against the doubts and fears that invade our minds.

We can’t make other people love us forever or perfectly, or even at all. Only God can love like that.

We can’t change other people. Hardened hearts are only awakened by God’s grace and mercy. No intentional action, no well-thought-out gift, no perfectly-timed word can do what God can do in an instant with a heart walled off by pain or fear.

Likewise, we cannot force people into a life in Christ. We can only be patient, pray, and wait upon the Lord.

We can’t expect our lives to turn out exactly how our self-focused plans and visions of perfect jobs and white picket fences have shown us. Only God’s plan for our life is filled with the type of character-building, pride-stifling, God-glorifying twists and turns that make it all good.

If we believe the lie that we can do this one and only life on our own, that we can control the successes or failures of our lives, we will be highly disappointed … and left completely broken. We are, after all, only human.

Without a daily dependence on God, our hearts will remain bruised and bleeding, our fears will conquer us, people will hurt us beyond repair, walled off hearts will stay hidden so authenticity becomes fiction, and we will constantly be in want of the life-giving fellowship and intimacy with the only Savior who can shine light into our darkness, transfiguring everything for good. That is indeed what the enemy craves.

When I was a girl, I was the poster-child for Little Miss Independent. I knew of God and believed in God, but I did not trust God with my life or thank Him in ways that were surely due. Romans 1:21 (NIV) says, “For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.” I was sure of what I knew and sure I knew everything. Stubborn as four mules, failure was just not an option. And since it was up to me to succeed or fail, I studied hard, practiced hard, and problem-solved hard. Success did come in the form of good grades, coveted spots on tennis teams, and all the appropriate rewards and trophies that accompany worldly achievement. But in truth, my foolish heart was darkened.

In college something happened that I could not problem-solve my way out of. I had nowhere to turn while shame and guilt laid heavy on my heart. The enemy was the first one at the door, spewing the age-old lie that I could fix this on my own. For months, he repeated the notion that I was “too good” to ask for help, too good not to handle this. You can fix it. You don’t need anyone else.

Then, something amazing happened. Jesus came knocking at that door, and He was about to show me a new way of thinking, a better way of acting, a selfless way of living, and a forgiving way of life that would make all my messes good, no matter how “bad” they were. Jesus erased the lie that I could fix life’s potholes on my own. Jesus’ message was fresher – full of hope, mercy, and dependence on Him. The stress of my mess vanished. Shame and guilt fell away. Rather than fighting my battle alone, Jesus promised me that He would stand by me and fight for me, if I would just trust Him. I, the great I AM, will make even this good.

It was a scary proposition at first – to give up my independence and instead, rely on the Lord in all things and in all ways. But when I really thought about it, my old life of independence was just that – a life independent … of joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. My old life was a lonely and painful one, full of competition and doubts. It was a stress-filled, pressure-cooker, too-busy-to-enjoy kind of life. In the end, I realized I had nothing to lose.

So I jumped in, and I have never looked back.

What part of your life are you holding onto, wrestling with God to keep in your own corner? What is the area where you fear giving up control? Whether it is with your finances, relationships, career, or even your faith itself, I pray you jump in. Don’t let your heart be hardened by the lie that you can do it, fix it, solve it, or succeed by yourself. Trade your independent way of thinking for a life full of peace and joy. I promise you: it is worth it.

Prayer – Heavenly Father, thank You for never forsaking us. Thank You for filling our holes, mending our hurts, giving us strength, and forgiving our sins. You do it all, and for all, we give thanks. I pray for those who do not know a life in You. I pray that someday, their hearts melt and they finally invite You in to make things good. I am forever dependent on You. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

© 2013 As A Clay Jar. All rights reserved.